Editors note: It was a few months ago when I just knew that my time was near. I eventually went to the EM ward for some chest pains that turned out to be some calcification of the heart which is one of those things that are either progressive/degenerative in nature and can accelerate in the future or maybe not. Bottom line was; it was not my time (yet).
I can remember a short while ago when you just know that you know. It was that kind of feeling that came over me. It was the sort of feeling that you knew that your time was up. Initially, a flood of emotions cascade over you like a tsunami wave. Wave after wave of emotions. In one way, you are never prepared. Never. In another way, you want to get all your personal affairs in line so that it will not be a burden to others.
But then something interesting takes place –
It's like the feeling that you get where you just want to make your peace with everything and everyone around you. It’s actually quite a liberating experience because it feels like an incredible weight has been lifted off your shoulders and going beyond reality (or at least the reality you know), you find peace. No more trials. No more tribulations. Of course you make your peace with God (Jesus) and just that realization right there gives you enormous comfort. Even thinking about it will lessen your pain.
This is where all the thoughts, words, and deeds come into the fray and you know that you know that the vehicle that you were driving maybe didn’t have the right engine, or the right balance, or the newest tires or best paint. Maybe on that road you were stranded, or the bills had to be paid, and your faith was tested, and you were lonely and afraid. Maybe you also had trouble finding your way.
But, your road had been traveled, and you made a few stops along the way, ate a few meals, and made a few friends. You also felt bad because you allowed your vehicle to sometimes break down or you didn’t give it the right service our tune up or you had some accidents along the way and had hurt someone. You sorely wished you could go back on that road and ask them to forgive and did so in your soul.
You just knew that you had almost reached your final destination…
And you knew that all you had to do was to wait until your chauffeur would arrive. As you looked back on all your ups and downs on that long and winding road that sometimes you veered off, you knew that it was your final destination that you needed to attain. You realized that you were not the best driver but knew that your eternal chauffeur would be by for you. So you now had a new perspective looking back on all the failings, hurt and pain and looked forward to a life of gain.
Forgiveness was the key to ride in this car - to "forgive them", you, and we.
Are your bags packed?
Scott Sepanek
TheRaptureCult.com
Shibboleth144@yahoo.com